9 Temmuz 2012 Pazartesi

Who Let the Crazy Out?

To contact us Click HERE
If you're my mom, know my mom, or have children of your own, you probably shouldn't read this post. Don't say I didn't warn you. 

I don't advise this to anyone in the entire world. Chasing people down the highway because they cut you off and were rude is against like 50 laws.
Yesterday I turned on a non-interstate highway from a little country road on a mission to get food. As a responsible driver, I put my phone down, stopped facebooking, and looked both ways before I turned left onto the four-lane highway. To my right, a pickup truck was coming, but he was far enough away for me to make the turn and get out of his way without either of us dying.

And then he had to pull a redneck.

I turned onto the highway and looked in my rearview mirror and this hillbilly moron was in my backseat. The ONLY way he could've done that was to floor it. I won't even mention that if he had wanted to speed up like an a-hole, he could've gotten in the other lane.

But he didn't. Without thinking that he did it out of pure spite, I got over into the far lane so that he could pass me. I signaled and everything, continuing to be a responsible grownup.

And then he had to pull a redneck.

This *insert line of expletives here* sped up, got in front of me, and slammed. on. his. breaks. I hit the horn and signaled to him that I was not pleased with his actions, to which he returned the favor because it was my fault that he had to act like a butthole.

And then, I pulled a crazy.

He thought he was going to play a little trick for his little girlfriend so she would know how cool he was before speeding away. He didn't realize he had screwed with a certifiably insane woman with little to no purpose. So I tailed him. We may or may not have almost hit the triple digits. If he moved, I moved.

I snapped out of it for a minute and realized that I was breaking about 60 laws to bully a 17 year old redneck kid with a compensation problem out for a hell-ride. I finally got over and passed him, continuing on my journey for food.

I wasn't satisfied.

I slowed down to a crawl, eyeing him in my rearview mirror....just like the serial killers do on television and Craigslist. Finally, he floored it again and made a feeble attempt to get away from me and my equally crazy VW. I chased him again. Fretful looks from the side mirrors proved that my mission to stop a road-bully was a success.

But, this is a story about how crazy defeats redneck...and how I bet you my car that that boy will not ever do that again.

Hiç yorum yok:

Yorum Gönder